Sure, pick on the Aussie
by DownUnderSister
Summary: What happens when Prussia and Spain find Australia's weakness? Read on to find out... A bunch of stories between Australia, Prussia and maybe Spain.
1. Chapter 1

Australia walked into the large room where today's world meeting was being held. He looked around and found one empty seat between Spain and Prussia. Australia took his seat quickly as he didn't want to listen to an hour long lecture from Germany, it would be like living with England again. The Australian was minding his own business when the Prussian roughly jabbed his side.

Australia jumped, holding his side. "What was that for?" he asked but only got Prussia's trademark laugh in return.

The poor Australian was then jabbed on the other side by Spain. Australia yelped again and stared with wide green eyes at the pair. He then looked across the table at Switzerland who seemed to have been watching the event.

"Come on mate, help me out here" Australia pleaded.

"Nope, sorry, I'm not getting involved" the Swiss replied holding his hands up defensively.

Australia was still holding his sides, trying to protect himself from the other invading nations/exnation. Australia looked around the room, trying to find an empty seat that he could move to. "Maybe I could switch with Russia" he thought. At that very moment Prussia and Spain started drawing on Australia's exposed arms.

"What the bloody hell are you two doing!" Australia yelled, batting away the others hands.

Prussia looked up at the Australian with his crimson red eyes. "It's fun and I'm awesome!" he smiled.

"Si, your reactions are so funny" The Spaniard added, "You sound like one of those squeaky toys that has lost its squeak."

The Australian stood up defensively. "No I don't!"

Just as he stood up France suddenly appeared from nowhere and leaned on the Australian's shoulder making him jump.

"You two should try touching his neck" France told the pair as he made out to poke Australia's neck. Australia flinched away from the slender finger approaching his neck.

Australia stared at the Frenchmen in shock and thought, "How did he know that I don't like my neck being touched?" The Australian then quickly forgot as he saw the two inching towards him with hands reaching for the Australian's neck. There facial expressions alone could probably have sent them to jail.

"No! Leave me alone, don't touch me you paedophiles!" Australia screamed at the two as he ran out of the meeting room. Spain and Prussia hot on his trail.

"Bloody frog! This is your fault isn't it?" England asked as he smacked France on the back of his head.

"Non, I was just giving them some advice" France replied, smoothing down his blond locks.

"Hey dudes, should we help him?" America asked in between mouthfuls of coke and hamburgers.

England sighed "No, he's his own continent for god's sake, I think he can look after himself."

The doors to the meeting room opened and Prussia and Spain skipped into the room, giggling like little school girls, holding Australia's pants. England looked at both of them in shock. France on the other hand ran out of the room in search of a pantless Australian.

"Don't you dare touch him you wanker!" England screamed down the hall as he chased after France.


	2. Prussia's evil uprising

**This is Prussia's response story to 'Sure pick on the Aussie'… **

**Prussia's evil uprising or The gradual demise of Prussia**

One lovely day Prussia was doing his thing, you know that awesome thing you do when you're alone, in a dark room…. with a torch…. SHADOW PUPPETS! So anyways, Prussia was shadow puppeting when BAM the door swung open and a blinding light filled the room.

"God?" Prussia asked innocently, staring into the light.

"No, but come to think of it…" said the muscular figure in the door way. It was Australia, his backward ways and kangaroo scent was recognisable anywhere.

Prussia, still slightly blinded by the light, awkwardly stood up and went to greet Australia, scratching his head in a stunned and confused manner. "What can the awesome me do for you?" he asked Australia.

"You've already done it mate" Australia said provocatively, giving the albino a wink. He then reached out to Prussia in a 'let's hug but not in a gay way' sort of way.

Prussia, being the kind and polite gentleman that he was, awkwardly accepted the Australian's hug. Big mistake. Within one second of them touching, Australia had Prussia in a tight head lock. Australia then dragged Prussia to a Commonwealth convention that was conveniently just down the road from where he was staying.

"You know I hate it when you bring your lovers to our serious meetings Australia." Said an annoyed England.

"Yeah, and what happened to our 'special' alone time" winked America.

"What the bloody hell are you doing here America?" England yelled "You're not part of the Commonwealth!"

"Hey dude, chill, I'm allowed to be here if I want to" America replied, pulling out a hamburger.

"But look!" Australia interrupted, pointing at Prussia's small, but not abnormally small, just small ears. "They're puny!"

"They are proportional, not small, not big but proportional to my face!" Rebutted Prussia, but it was too late. The room was already laughing at his expense.

Something clicked that day for Prussia, whether it was the fact that he was no longer a country, or the fact that he still walks into things. Prussia had changed, for the better. No longer was he going to be the nice guy, he was sick of finishing last. No longer would he be laughed at, in this dog eat dog world, he would be the one laughing.

That day, in the room full of Commonwealth countries, Prussia fought back. To start his rebel rampage, Prussia poked Australia in the stomach. In a moment of surprise and awe at Prussia's manliness, Australia let out a gasp that sounded like a squeaky toy without the squeak.

"Let's pick on Prussia they said, let's laugh at his small ears they said!" Yelled Prussia as he flipped over a table. "WELL LOOK WHO'S LAUGHING NOW!"

Fed up with his 'modest' life, Prussia did the only thing that a person would do in this situation, he took the clothes off of everyone, including himself, and burnt them all (the clothes that is, not the people). In a rush of confusion and nudity, Prussia pranced out of the room and went to show society who was boss. However, he was quickly arrested for indecent exposure and put into a mental asylum.

Still slightly confused and naked the Commonwealth countries were unsure of what to do next. After an awkward silence, Australia perked up (in more ways than one) "Well, I guess we do what we usually do at these meetings. I mean, Prussia has saved us time by burning our clothes."

The room burst out in applause. Some clapped because Australia was right but others clapped because they were proud that someone could be such a bright spark, and confident when it was just so small.

But of course you already know what they say about men with big kangaroos….


	3. Spain and Orange

Australia was on his way to Spain's house. Ever since THAT incident at the world meeting, the Australian had kept his distance from Spain and Prussia, but today was a new day. Being the friendly and optimistic person he was, Australia had planned to set things straight.

The Australian had arrived at the Spaniards large house and pressed the door bell, letting a lovely tune ring throughout the house. After hearing some muffled noises from within, the door swang open revealing a flustered Prussian. Australia looked down, noticing that Prussia's pants were, well, non-existent; instead he was only wearing a pair of black and white boxers.

"Australia? What are you doing here?" Prussia asked the shocked Australia.

"Um, well, I came to see Spain" Australia said, not knowing what to think of the situation, or where to look for that matter. "Why are YOU here?"

"Well Spain and I were, you know, kesesese" The Prussian laughed, motioning things that the poor Australian didn't want to see.

"Maybe I should come back later" Australia said as he turned to leave but was grabbed from behind and pulled into the house by the surprisingly strong Prussian.

Australia was about to say something when Spain walked into the room, with no pants on….

"Hola Australia" Spain said with a smile walking towards the two. "Did you come to join us?"

"NO, um I mean no, I came to give you this" Australia said as he held out a small bag to the Spaniard.

Spain took the bag and pulled out a fine looking red button down shirt that any man would love to wear. "What is this?" Spain asked as a dark aura, which rivalled even Russia's, started to appear.

"It's, it's a red shirt, I thought you loved red" Australia said, slightly taken aback. "You know, like a tomato…."

Spain let the shirt fall to the ground, once it had landed he started to jump and stomp on it. Australia could just stare in shock as a perfectly good shirt was being destroyed before his eyes. He looked over at Prussia, who was standing with his arms folded over his chest and a smirk plastered on his face.

"Kesese you made him angry" Prussia smirked "I love it when his angry."

"I LIKE ORANGE!" Spain yelled, still stomping on the shirt. "ORANGE, ORANGE, ORANGE!"

At that moment Spain stopped and looked at the Australian. "You have to make it up to me now" Spain said in a creepy voice while he slowly got closer to Australia.

Australia tried to back away but was stopped by Prussia who was now restraining his arms. Spain quickly grabbed his legs and Australia was carried into a dark room while he screamed for help. Romano, of course, was too busy yelling at Germany about being a potato bastard to help.


End file.
